i really....

I really miss you....
I wish things and situation differently when we meet.
I fall in love with you the first time i lay my eyes on you.
You are so perfect in my sight.
I wonder how could someone as beautiful as you exist.
Where have you been in my life ?
I miss you, i want to see you everyday.
Not just from your picture.
When night come i stared at your picture and whisper your name........
Everyday i miss you, every second in my daily life i think about you.
I worried always and what are you doing, where are you going.....
The woman you loved must be the lucky one.
I saw your picture, smilling happily hugging a woman. 
I know its time for me to go far away......
I know i never existed in your eyes i wish i do but the reality you hate me so much.
You hate me so much that you can't even see i love you already.
If hates me makes you happy then i want you hates me so so much.
Only your happiness matter for me, anything else just dissappear.
I want to see your smile everyday, i wish i could but sometimes reality doesn't match my dream.
I'm not well and someday i will forget you and forget everything.
But i just want God give me a chance to remember only you if my time come.
I love you until the end of time.
You are my heartbeat.
The truth is i can't live without you and live in same city with you makes me happy.
Thats why i can't leave this city but if i can, i always remember you.
I love you for the way you are.
I love everything about you.
The way you walk...
The way you talk....
The way you smirk...
The way you smile....
The way your smile when you angry...
The way your eyes stared....
The way you play your hand when you talk.....
You never be wrong and there's no bad stories, even when you do me wrong.
The way you always makes me feel when i see you....
The truth is i can't control my self if i'm with you, i can't do that.
That's why i always ignore you.
I love you, i only want you.
Sometimes in my heart says i have to be with you but i can't.
If loving you is wrong, i want to be wrong forever.
I love you my baby blue.... always and i love you until the end of time.

With love and pray
Joan Maria Louise Mantiri

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